Grieving the loss of a loved one is a long and difficult process that strains one’s mental health. This often becomes harder around the holidays. Most people expect this time of year to be spent with loved ones, and missing one of the most important people in your life can make the whole season feel much emptier. For those who have lost a loved one, the holidays will likely be very different and understandably difficult. However, acknowledging the loss and coordinating with other close family and friends to honor the lost loved one’s memory and create new traditions will make the season warm once again. Holidays can get stressful, so taking care of yourself is essential to a cheerful holiday season.
Addressing One’s Own Needs
No matter what events are planned with friends and family, people who are grieving should take time or do whatever is necessary for their own needs to prevent themselves from feeling overwhelmed. Some helpful techniques and reminders for maintaining mental health in the holiday season are listed below.
- Skip events: If an event feels overwhelming or brings up painful emotions, then don’t go. If an event becomes too much, leaving early is perfectly alright as well. Prioritizing one’s own mental health is more valuable than a single get-together.
- Communicate with living loved ones: One way to help make grieving easier is to reach out to a support network. Asking friends and family for help honoring your loved one’s memory is a great way to remember cherished moments with them. If family events are emotionally difficult to understand, letting them know ahead of time will also prevent additional stress or strain in those relationships.
- Don’t participate in holiday traditions: For many people who are grieving, giving gifts or sending holiday cards is painful. Don’t feel obligated to participate in these traditions if they don’t bring the same joy they once did.
- Consider professional support: No matter how well someone is able to handle their feelings, seeking professional help and counseling is an important tool to help deal with grief. Support groups may also provide a community of people with similar experiences that relate to the pain of losing loved ones.
- Journal: Journaling is a great emotional outlet that can help people process the events that happen in their lives.
Honoring a Loved One’s Memory
Spending time honoring their memory at holiday events may bring comfort and help make the holiday season easier as well. Some ways to honor their memory include:
- Visit their grave: Bringing a wreath or other holiday-related items to their grave can help make it feel like they can still celebrate the holidays and provide comfort.
- Light a candle or leave an empty seat in their honor: Having a tangible reminder that they are still there for the holiday is helpful for many. However, if leaving an empty seat is too painful of a reminder, then inviting an extra friend or family member who may not be able to celebrate otherwise will help make new memories and bring the whole group closer together in light of the recent loss.
- Have friends and family describe their favorite memories of lost loved ones: Reminiscing about loved ones that have passed can help keep their memory alive and bring back thoughts of fond moments that will help make grieving less painful.
- Play their favorite music: If there are any holiday songs that a late parent, loved one or friend especially enjoyed, playing those songs at a holiday dinner or event can be soothing as well.
- Look at photo albums or old photos: Looking at photos is a way to still have the loved one present in memory even if they have passed on. This could be a private photobook or a new wall of photos for the whole family to enjoy.
As we enter the holiday season, there are many people mourning so remember, you are not alone. Finding ways to take care of oneself and to honor your departed friend or family will make this painful holiday season a bit more cheerful. memory will make spending the holidays without them less painful.
